A friend of mine is going through a hard time at work. A few days ago, he asked me, “If you had unlimited money and resources, and didn’t need your day job, what would you spend my time doing?”

“Well”, I told him, “I’d pretty much be doing what I do when I’m not at work.” I’d spend time with my family, take pictures, play music, and cook. The only difference is that I’d have more time to do it, and I’d probably throw in a bit more travel.

I gave my response without much hesitation; the answer came pretty naturally. After all, I only have a limited amount of time per day, so why wouldn’t I be spending those free hours doing what I wanted to be doing?

It’s only now, a few days later, that it strikes me how different my life is now than it was a few years ago. Back then, I would have fumbled for an answer, probably muttering something generic and uninspired. “Uh, I don’t know. But not this!” Now, however, my answer is easy, and inspired, and honest. Spending time with my family, something I’m learning to do better every day, is my favorite thing to do, and finding new ways to do it is a challenge I eagerly look forward to every day. That they inspire me, and help me, serving as my models, my taste testers, and my sounding boards, is a gift that I don’t appreciate nearly as much as I need to.

If I’ve learned nothing else this year, it’s that if you’re not spending your time doing the things you want to be doing instead of the things you have to be doing, then you are on the wrong path and it’s time for a change.

What do you want to be doing?

As I flipped my calendar to its final page this morning, there loomed the word “December”, all in capital, bold letters. Slowly, the letters started to move. I watched in amazement, puzzled, and obviously suffering from a severe lack of sleep. The letters multiplied, and changed, until where one was the last month of the year now read “What have you accomplished this year?”

Immediately, my mind went to all of the things that I didn’t accomplish. All of the things that a year ago I was determined to do, full of vigor, and now, 335 days later, they sit unfinished. That iPhone app? Yeah, not done. Short story? Not started. Writing more? Taking more pictures? Not so much. The “unaccomplished” list is much, much longer than I am willing to admit, and longer than any list of things that I might have accomplished.

I’m pretty hard on myself, in general, so of course my reasoning for why things didn’t get done automatically involved all the time I wasted watching television, or playing games. And yet, when I force myself, reluctantly, to see past the mile-long list of failures, my sense of despair and self-loathing is lifted. All of that free time that I had hoped to dedicate to taking over the world? Instead, I did something much more important with it. I came home from work, and spent time with my family. Most nights I make dinner (now junior likes to “help”), and we hang out as a family until junior goes to bed. Even thinking it about it now as I write, a smile forms on my lips. My greatest accomplishments this year weren’t even on my list; being a present father and husband.

I might not have gotten as much done this year as I wanted to, but in terms of quality over quantity, I think 2011 turned out to be a pretty good year.

I decided to move my cooking-related posts over to a new website at uncheffed. The idea behind the website is to post tips and techniques related to stepping up the cooking in our home kitchens. Specifically, the site will focus on the terminology and the basic techniques that everyone can use in their kitchen to improve their cooking skills. The name comes from the idea that you don’t need a culinary degree or to be a professional chef in order to elevate what is coming out of your kitchen at home.

For me, the site and my posts there will provide an opportunity to talk about the stuff that I am learning on my journey to improve my culinary skills, and hopefully help other folks looking to do the same thing. I’ve got a few local friends who might also be contributing to the site, and I welcome other like-minded individuals to let me know if they would like to contribute, as well.

More to come…